By
Maulana Wahiduddin Khan

The present age is the age of education and the greatest need is that our generation should be equipped with the learning of the highest standard. The right role of the parents is of utmost importance in this issue.

For parents there are only two options; either to accept whatever their children do or to understand their needs and minds and address them in such a way that they are able to grasp what is being said to them.

Those parents who fail to do this have nothing but complaints about the behaviour of the younger generation. It must be understood that it is possible to help our children to change their attitudes. The requirement for this is the intellectual ability of the parents and elders to properly address the minds of the present smart generation.

The facts however point out that majority of parents use traditional methods of putting across things to the children. This mindset of the parents needs to reassessed and a healthy blend of the traditional and the modern has to be worked out. Parents need to redefine their thinking in order to make it understandable to the new generation. It is failure in this regard that has given rise to resistance from children towards higher standards of learning. It is a question of self-training. If parents want to bring about a change of attitude towards learning in their children they must prepare themselves to be good counsellors. It is weak counselling on the part of the parents that has created this problem.

Pampered children know nothing beyond their own desires. They cannot meet the challenges which they have to face in the external world.

The second problem in regard to this aspect is the problem of pampering. Parents in their great affection for their children often pamper them. While caring is good, pampering is bad. Pampering fosters an easygoing nature in children. A comfort loving nature is the worst thing in this world of harsh realities. Pampered children know nothing beyond their own desires. They cannot meet the challenges which they have to face in the external world.

We can see many examples in our circle of acquaintance where children brought up under pampered conditions with their parents find it very difficult to cope with studies or work away from home. They find that everything is different and that they do not get the unconditional affection or care that they are used to, by those around them. Here, everything comes with a price in terms of hard work, adjustment, acceptance of reality, proving their ability and accepting the fact that many things cannot be changed. Without being trained for this they find themselves thrown into this situation. This leads them to facing a bigger challenge within the normal challenges of life.

The above result is the negative aspect of pampering. A pampered child is like a product turned out in the factory called home which is not suitable for the market. Parents should understand that their children require education not only in the professional field but that they also need spiritual training. The former kind can be had in educational institutions but the centre of learning for the latter is home. The parents are the teachers in this institution.

Parents need to redefine their thinking in order to make it understandable to the new generation. It is failure in this regard that has given rise to resistance from children towards higher standards of learning.

It is very important for the parents to realize that the language of do’s and dont’s will not serve any purpose. They must prepare themselves for a more sensitive and complex approach. Indeed they must prepare themselves in what may be termed as ‘rational spirituality’.

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