Parenting or child rearing is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, financial, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood. We all are familiar with the following maxim: To be born with a silver spoon, in reference to a child born in an affluent family. Favoured children are frequently less successful in their lives than those who have failed to find favour from their family. Favour is only another name for pampering. There is a better alternative for parents rather than giving favour; it is to give their child self-confidence. A non-favoured child is also a favoured child, but in a different sense; he has the selfconfidence and incentive to work hard. If you love your child and in all situations you are ready to provide him with help, that means you are making your child happy but with a side-effect; it will lessen the spirit of confidence in the child. Self-confidence is the best gift parents can give their children.
Parents cannot be with the children all through their life like shadows. Children as they grow have to face life with all the challenges it poses. Good parenting is to train your children to develop self-confidence to the extent that they may stand up to the challenges of life, especially in the later period of their lives. That kind of parenting is good which proves to be effective in their future and that kind of parenting is bad which has untoward results. It is not inside the home that parenting may be judged good or bad. It is outside the home that parenting must be judged. That parenting which proves effective outside the home is good parenting.
Parenting is a complex task. Parents have great love for their children. That is but natural, but as far as their children’s future is concerned, love alone is not enough. Love often turns into pampering their children. And over-providing is not good parenting. That can make a child too easy-going. He may shirk hard work and this tendency could stop his future development.
Good parenting calls for living between two opposites: on the one side being soft and on the other side being strict. Parents have to be both subjective and objective in their behaviour towards their offspring. Parents are almost always emotional towards their children. But according to the law of nature, emotional behaviour may not prove good for them. It is in their nature to be emotional, but the best parents are those who control their emotions and try to tackle the child with a realistic approach.
Good parenting calls for living between two opposites: on the one side being soft and on the other side being strict. Parents have to be both subjective and objective in their behaviour towards their offspring.
There are many examples of persons born into poor families, who after hard work, emerged as super achievers. For example, B. R. Ambedker (1891-1956) was born into a poor family in Maharashtra, who were subjected to socio-economic discrimination. Although Ambedkar was admitted to a local school, he was segregated and given little attention or help by his teachers. He was not even allowed to sit in the class. When he needed to drink water, someone from a higher caste would pour that water from a height, as he was not allowed to touch either the water or its vessel. But this hardship only enhanced his incentive to have an education. He used to read his school books by the street light because there was no electricity in his poor home. His efforts bore fruit. Despite all kinds of hardships he continued his studies till he emerged as a great expert on constitutional law. Finally, he was elected to the Constituent Assembly of India and was appointed to draft the first Constitution of India.
From the above example we can see that it is challenge that motivates the child to the extent that he can rise from ‘zero’ to a hero.
